Benjamin.my … and his miscellaneous takes on life.

Your One And Only Purpose Of Life, Be Happy

Have you ever been through a period of boredom, like you are meant to do something different? Something big and beautiful perhaps, or something simpler and happier. It differs from a person to person, and sometimes it feels like... you are trying to look for your purpose of life, the something that you are meant to be doing in this very brief life that you are given with. But that would be ridiculous because everyone has exactly the same purpose of life and it requires no seeking at all. All you ever meant to be... is to be happy.

Yes, to be happy. That is your purpose of life. That is my purpose of life. And that is the purpose of life everyone else has.

But wait you say, it can't be that simple. What about those people who are made to do great things. Great leaders who have led nations out of crisis, great philanthropists who have saved millions to billions of lives, and great thinkers who have inspired generations and generations of people? Surely they were written in their destiny somewhat and that they were able to discover it much later, eventually fulfilling what they were born to complete.

Let me try my best to explain. And there are two things that I need to elaborate. First, the definition of happiness. Second, how it leads to doing what you are "meant to be doing", which in my opinion are the channels to fulfill your life purpose (ie being happy) instead.

Definition of Happiness

Happiness in this context, is slightly different from what we usually define it as. You know when you get a brand new car, or a brand new house, or something that you have been anticipating is finally coming, you would be telling everybody around you that you are "soooooooo happy". And it would be feel somewhat like a toned down version of excitement isn't it? More subtle, yet probably last longer than excitement too.

But in terms of the purpose of life, happiness would feel a lot more like... contentment. It is a very subtle feeling of peace, of everything is going smoothly and as it should be. To put it simply, it feels like life is being very cooperative to you and nothing is going against you. There is no resistance within you so to speak.

So for you or everyone else, there is only 1 purpose of life, that is to live this feeling. The correct term would be, to be at peace, to be content, to be happy.

Then, What Are You Meant To Be Doing?

However, if the purpose of life is so simple, then what you are meant to be doing this life? Isn't there something that is destined for you by somewhere beyond the heavens?

The answer is very simple. You are meant to do whatever that would allow you to be at peace, to be content, to be happy as much as possible, and it doesn't matter if it involves a great mission of life, or just being plain average and simple.

Sometimes we tend to confuse that, our purpose of life has to be something grand. The thing is that, people who tend to discuss their own purpose of life, tend to be people who are more ambitious, who would like to see and control how their lives unfold. And so you hear them discussing how to inspire people, how to change humanity, how to save others lives. But noooo, it doesn't have to be that grand. It is perfectly okay to just be an employee in McDonald's that serves others with a smile, as long as that's what you feel happy about.

The Easiest Way To Find Your Channels Of Being Happy, Is Just To Do What That Allows You To Be Happy The Most

Fact is, simple and average living people tend to be happier than the ambitious people. They are more in-tune with life so to speak. They do not really resist life. Whatever life throws them, they accept it and moves on. Without any resistance, it is easy to be at peace with circumstances, to be content with what they have, however little it might be sometimes, and just be happy with life. Of course, try not to confuse simple and average living people, with people living below poverty line. They may be a lawyer living a good middle-class income, but still leads a simple life.

Ambitious people on the other hand, tend to resist life. They like to think that they are able to control how their life unfolds, and sometimes when things don't go their way, they become enraged, thus offering a lot of resistance towards life and no longer being at peace with circumstances. At the same time, these people are not content being simple and average, they want a mission that they can work on their entire life, something to be proud on when they look back at their last days. And that's absolutely nothing wrong with that. Problem is, most of us hardly know what that mission is... no?

It is not easy to figure out what you are meant to be doing, and that's for a very good reason. You are never destined to be doing anything. Even if you delve into destiny study, it usually points out a likely path that is not guaranteed. It's up to you to decide what you would like to achieve in this life, and some of your natural talents, natural gifts may lead you into certain likely fields.

So, a good way to figure out what is your purpose of life, or in the context of this article, the channel in which to fulfill your purpose of life which is happiness, is to keep doing things that allow you to feel content about life.

Everyime you do something that makes you feel happy, it leads you nearer to the channels of fulfilling your life purpose. You give things a try, and decide that they are not too bad at all, and you won't mind doing some of them more often. Through that, you would refine your desires and be more specific what is even better in allowing you to be happy. Eventually, you would come upon something that you have finally decided that, you don't mind doing this for the rest of your life at all.

The channels may be changing through your life, or it may not. It doesn't matter. But there will be something that at this moment, you don't mind, or better still, would love to do.

You may start out as a tax accountant, sorting out the taxation problems that your customers may have. And you find delights in solving what your customers perceive as hell-ish tasks. So you keep doing it. One day, you may be inspired to bring it up to a next level. You ask yourself, "hey why don't I run an educational seminar on the taxation system to educate your customers and their friends?", and you ran your first seminar. Not long afterwards, you receive feedbacks that your attendees would like more information on certain topics, and you started running more specific seminars in addressing those needs. Then you might even find the urge to write a book, start a blog, or run a advisory group with help from volunteers. One day you look back, and you realize, wow... you have done so much. But really, it all started just by doing what you like to do. :)

Of course your life wouldn't unfold in the exact way. But hopefully it would give you a rough idea how things would be like, just sticking to what you like. I was just telling a friend the other day that, I think most professions that help people one way or another way, via healing, via inspiring, via motivating etc, are likely to be the most fulfilling jobs. So maybe you can start there.

Now perhaps you belong to a different group, you are an accountant who hates his job. "Every time the end of financial year comes, I have to stay up all night and rush for deadlines. How could I ever feel happy with this job?" you say. If you cannot accept it, try to remove yourself from it. Look for another job, perhaps transfer out of your department. Your new job may have lower salary, or it may not be exactly what you want to do right now (which perhaps you do not yet have a solid idea), but it is a good start to not feel all the resistance everyday. Then slowly, explore and look for things that please you. Slowly but surely, you will get closer and closer to a channel that would make you content with life. Tricky bit is that, you will have to start soon, if not now, or it would not appear magically out of thin air one day and just land on your laps.

In Short...

In essence, the common mis-conception of purpose of life, is that it has to be something grand and inspiring, like being the president, being the the richest guy in the world, or being a saint like Buddha etc, and that the ones who achieved it, must have discovered their purpose of life somehow one day. Truth is, it is nothing like that. Your purpose of life is simple, that is to be happy, to be at peace, to be content with your life. The channels to achieve this purpose could vary greatly and it doesn't matter.

Why did some of the greatest people in history end up doing what they do? Because as they continue to be, or strive to be content with their lives, they realize that certain channels, certain mediums, certain missions are more likely to allow their being of happiness than the others, and so they moved towards the great things that they have done.

But let's not discount many others who lived their lives happily without leaving any footprint in the history. They do, have fulfilled their purpose of life.

My Version Of God

God is life. Life is everywhere. God is not some external divine being that you have to believe in and worship.

God created the world, similar to how we create our body. We are all interconnected cells in God's body.

The only way to honoring God, is to honor life itself. Stay conscious, and live life to your fullest potential.

The only reason for life, is for God to experience himself through you. You are an irreplaceable part in the grand design of the world.

4 Easy Steps To Setting Achievable Resolution And Goals

Another new year has dawned upon us. Apart from attending parties and recovering from your hang over, have you done the most important thing for the year yet like creating a list of your resolutions or goals for the upcoming year? Most of us would have no doubt have a brief idea of what we would like to achieve in the coming new year. Unless goals are created in an empowering way, they are nothing but a fleeting idea. True goal, act as a signpost pointing you towards the ultimate reward that you have desired.

Here in this article, the term Resolution refers to the ultimate goal of the year, where as the term Goal refers to the mini-steps leading to your Resolution.

Only 1 Resolution For The Year

The most common mistake everybody does, is creating list of resolutions. The list would contain so many things that a person would love to improve on in the coming year that he wouldn't be able to remember any of them without the list. My advice is, don't do that!

Stick with only 1 resolution. Decide which area of your life requires the most attention this year, and set a resolution to improve upon it. Sticking with only 1 resolution allows you to focus 110% on it and plan your entire year accordingly without conflict. More importantly, you will remember your resolution through the year and consistently measuring your own progress towards it. That will keep you focused and motivated. :)

Having more than 1 resolution not only create possible conflicts, it also spreads thin your energy and focus. You may end up only making minimal progress in all of them. You may also find yourself more likely to switch your focus to another resolution when times get tough, instead of biting the bullet and pushing right through. As much as all of us wanting maximum results in minimal time, working on 1 thing at a time is THE most efficient way. Try raising the standards instead if you feel that you are not being challenged enough living with only 1 resolution.

Your Resolution Must Be Measurable So That It Can Be Broken Down to Measurable Goals

Your resolution and goals need to be measurable. It is important to be able to determine whether you are there or not. It should only be a yes or no every time you do an evaluation on your progress. Are you there yet? Yes or no? If no, how far are you?

A bad goal would be asking for financial abundance in the upcoming year. How much is abundant for you? $10,000? $100,000? $100 million? Your mind isn't able to compute the end results. For that reason, you will not be able to break down your goal into smaller steps to lead you towards the your resolution.

However if you instead, set a resolution of earning $10,000 monthly by end of the year. Now you can break down the resolution into smaller goals for every month. $2,000 for January, $2,500 for February, $4,000 for March etc. Then through the year, you can measure your own progress against your smaller goals, and adjust accordingly if your progress is slower or faster than anticipated. For example, you would be able to ask yourself if you are earning $2,500 in February, in March, and the answer would be yes or no only.

Being able to measure your progress is very important because if you are slower than anticipated, you will need to find out more ways to accelerate your progress.

What do you have to change to achieve your goals?

This is definitely the most important step in setting achievable goals. Most people forget to ask this question when laying out their resolutions and goals, as if the goals would automatically be accomplished without nothing ever being changed. But we all know that that hardly happens. Hence, you need to ask yourself, what do you have change to achieve your goals?

Say you want to earn $10,000 a month by end of the year, as stated in the example above, what do you have to change? Do you want to get a part-time job, change your existing work, take up a professional course, start looking into investing etc? You may even feel that starting a business is the path to go. Whichever way you choose isn't important. What's most important is that, you must not sit at where you are hoping for a windfall. It doesn't happen.

Depending on your circumstances, the answer may not always be very straight-forward. Then perhaps this question would serve you better: "What am I willing to change to achieve my goals?" Set your bottom line and look out for opportunities. When they come, and if they are not below your bottom line, why not give it a try right? :)

All goals require sacrifices. If you are not willing to change anything, then quite likely you wouldn't be able to accomplish anything by end of the year. How your life is now... is how your life will be if nothing changes.

To put it shortly, the ability to achieve your yearly resolution, ultimately lies in your ability to be committed to the changes that would lead you towards the end result.

Write Everything Down

So you have chosen your one and only resolution for the year. It is measurable, and you have further broken it down into goals to be achieved for the 12 months of the year. You have also asked yourself the most important question, what do you have to change in order to succeed, and you have figured out a pretty good answer to that question. What's next? Write everything down!

It is important to stay committed to your decisions made regarding your resolution and goals. You can't stay committed if you start forgetting tiny bits of them. Write everything down in your journal, in a piece of card, in a place where you are sure that you would keep it for the rest of the year, then refer to your notes every now and then. You may find it helpful to put up a copy of these notes on walls where you frequent, just to remind yourself of your resolutions and goals through the year.

These notes that you jot down, will be your judge. Every month, take out the notes and ask yourself if you have achieved the monthly goal. Yes or no? Evaluate if you have been sticking with the changes that you have decided earlier on as required. Make sure that everything is on track. :)

Without these notes to hold you accountable, you may find yourself straying away from your goals unconsciously and the next minute before you realize, you are in another new year setting another list of goals to be achieved without the ones before being accomplished first.

So there you go. :) Happy New Year, and may all your resolution and goals come true!

It’s Okay To Be Here Right Now, And Not There

Lately, it had been quite a stressful period for me. For one, it's the end of the year, and I can't help but to evaluate how well have I done in the past 12 months. Am I any nearer to my goals? Have I accomplished my resolutions? I bet that's what you would do too.

Me however, I have to deal with another issue. My birthday is coming up too... just one week prior to the new year, at the very happening day of Christmas Eve. Ya know, when end of the year comes, you usually look back at the past year and see how have you been doing. However, when your birthday comes, you look back at your entire life and see how far have you progressed. Then when you mix both together, and when there really isn't much to show, without proper outlet, the stress just kept piling up for me. Wasn't an easy period for me.

After about 3 weeks of depression (triggered by some customer complaint where I felt that I did my best), I really felt like I couldn't take it anymore. All the stress was just unimaginable. I saw no way out. Everything just seems to be against me. I was just lost. Very lost. I have this buddy who is also going through a similar phase and so we were like feeding off each other's negative energy, continuously delving deeper into a very negative state.

One day I realized, I can't do this anymore. This is bullshit. If I keep telling myself how bad things are, keep feeling sorry for myself, things are only going to get worse! I need to drag myself out of the negative state as soon as possible.

So I sat down quietly one afternoon, trying to do some inner work to cleanse all these negative energies roaming within me. And my inner guide told me...

It's okay. It's okay to be here right now. It's okay to be here right now and not there, there where you want to be. It's okay to not be at where you want to be right now and there is no need to feel unhappy about it. There is no need for resistance. There is no need of inacceptance. It is okay. Life is never harder than what you could handle.

It's okay to be feeling disappointed right now, to be feeling lost and stuck right now. It's okay. But stop holding so tightly onto your emotions. Right now, at this very second, there is no problem. It may be a problem tomorrow, or it may be a problem next week. But right now, at this very second, there is no problem.

Nothing you want is in the upstream. Stop fighting against the current. Just let go. The stream of life will carry you to wherever your desires are.

Accept the now, so you can work towards your future. When you deny your present moment, when you offer so much resistance against the now, you are not establishing your anchor point. You know where you are not right now, but where are you right now exactly anyway? How far exactly are you with where you want to be, do you know that?

By Law of Attraction, when you are feeling so stuck, so depressed, there is only one thing that could happen. That is you drift further and further away from where you want to be. Realistically speaking, that's also true. When you are depressed, much like how I was, you wouldn't be very motivated at all. More and more things are neglected and your life gets worse and worse. Depending on how far down before you could realize where you are heading, then maybe things would improve a little following your awakening. Some however, never make it to the awakening till their death. They ended their life right when it hits the rock bottom.

This is actually heavily influenced by the book, The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle. Surrendering to the now is very very important. Actually as soon as I started accepting that I do not have to push against the present moment too much, the stress slowly goes away. Nothing external has changed yes. But when you started embracing light instead of darkness, everything does not look that bad anymore. I have came a long way, and I have a lot to show if I want to. :) You have too! There is no need to be too difficult on ourselves. We are where we are and it is not going to change right now. But it can change the very next second. And then the next, and then the next. :) Just that it always starts with right now, with this very moment.

It was also helpful that the same night, I was able to adjust the way my buddy was thinking a little bit. It is good to break the cycle and stop feeding each other negative energies that keep putting down both of us.

In a way this article is about me and my recent experience. However, I am sharing this in the hope that maybe it will help somebody out there going through the same phase of feeling stuck and lost with their life. And when you too can start accepting the now and offer no resistance to it. Immediately, good things are lining up for you once again. :)

Or if you don't buy into the loa stuff, at least your mind would be less cluttered and more open to options when you are not depressed. So just stay strong!

It's okay!